Its been 4 days

I'm lonely again ..
I miss you badly , how about you ?
Still mad at me huh ?
Time is needed for everyone ..
Who knows what will happen at the future ..
We might be strangers , we might be friends ..
Who knows .. Just let the time flows ..
You're free to everyone now ..
Even though I am jealous , I can't do anything about it ..
Thats your life ..
I hope I can wish you happy but , is a strange feeling for me ..
Maybe thats the jealousing heart of mine ..
I'm lost out for the past few days ..
Almost get kill by myself ..
I can't really survive when you leaved me ..
Now days I'm still crying alone in my bedroom ..
I can't release my heart to be truely happy ..
Things that happen really hurts me ..
But now I can't find anyone that I really can talk with so i decide to write my blog again ..
Its been awhile I didn't write a long blog like this to release my heart ..

I saw that you're more happier than before ..
Am I right ? You had more friends now ..
They made you happy , they accompany you ..
Is much  better than me ..
Is that the true reason that you leave me ?
You wants to be happy ..
The reason you gave to everyone , is that the real ?
You told me , you never angry me for that ..
You're still ok with it , but then when you came back for CNY , you started to change ..
Or just what they say , I think too much ?
I wish I was that I think too much ..
Is really suffer for me ..

As everyone say , in my age just a puppy love ..
Doesn't matter at all and dont take it too seriously ..
But , what I have to say is , this realation is not JUST a PUPPY LOVE to me ..
Its means a lot and Its means forever to me ..
I knew you're the Mr. Right for me .. As people says as true love ..
I still remember the time when you asked me to marry you ..
Its September 9th 2010 , in my bedroom , around 7.30p.m - 8p.m ..
I take it seriously ,  you know ?
If I don't , I wouldn't say YES without a thinking ..
Because I really love you ..

In this area , there are too much memories of me and you ..
Wherever I go , whatever I do .. The memories are there ..
It makes me think of you again .. I miss you on the spot but I cant do anything else more ..
Too much memory in this country , not area ..
Memories floating around my mind .. They makes me tears all the time ..
I wish to have a second chance to hug you again ..
Without your pushing ..
I miss you badly now ..

Sorry that I love you , Sorry that I selfish on you , Sorry that I really need you ..
I tried to be strong , but I have no brave to be that strong ..
I'm still a little girl .. Don't think that I'm really matured at all ..
I still need someone to love me , I still need someone to take care of me , I still need someone to "tam" me ..
The one that I needed is just only you ..
Noone could give me the love except for you .. You're my one and only special one ..
hope you knows that ..

ILY